Friday, October 7, 2011
Jumping out of the fire
So here's the deal: There is a gorgeous, huge Cape Cod for rent at an excellent price in a prime location. My husband, son & I went to check it out last night & we just fell in love with it. Thing is, it's for rent November 1st & we should, out of respect & integrity, give our landlord a month's notice. Also, what a stressful rush to pack up everything & clean this place in 3 short weeks!!! Especially with a demanding 5 1/2 year old around.
Why such a desire to move? Well, where we live right now, at the month's end, we will have been here for 2 years, fulfilling our 2 year lease. When we moved into this side by side duplex, on the other side was our landlord, who was single & very quiet. See, there is nothing between our walls: No firewall, no nothing. So you can hear every single noise, including someone urinating in the bathroom. I like quiet. Yes, it's not something I get much of with an active little boy, but adding someone else's noise on top of his is almost too much for me.
About 7 months ago, our landlord had his buddy move in with him. Now, his buddy was nothing like him: He would get drunk regularly, smoke dope out on the back porch & curse & swear loudly, going off on anyone from the landlord to Bell Aliant on the phone. This went on for 6 months. Thankfully, this wasn't an every day thing, so I tolerated it. A month ago, he moved out. So I thought, finally peace & quiet again. Not to be.
Then the renovations began. Hardcore renos. Video cameras & alarm systems were being installed, as well as the kitchen being redone. Why? Because our landlord had decided to rent the other side out as a business of sorts. A teenage boy with severe Autism would be being prepped to go into a group home. They'd be teaching him things like washing dishes, cooking, etc. This goes on everyday, Mon-Friday, 10-3 (but people are in there longer some days, doing things). So daily now, starting this past week, I constantly hear people cheering loudly all day. I see numerous vehicles parked outside. People are in and out all day. It's like a mini circus. My landlord, did however, inform me that they wanted to do this from 8-6 and sometimes on weekends, & he'd refused. So if that is the case, I am very grateful for that! I am seldom awake at 8!
My husband was adamant about us renting the Cape Cod after we saw it, & set out to figure it all out, & try to see if our landlord would allow us to just pay him the extra for us leaving earlier than with a month's notice.
Bedtime came, & we both laid there in the dark. I was thinking & thinking, & then the Lord began to speak to me & remind me of some things. He made me see that the circumstances couldn't be of Him. First of all, the Lord would want us to have integrity & give a full month's notice. He wouldn't put us in a position of not honoring that. Secondly, the Lord wouldn't put us in a position of being rushed. Rushing breeds stress, & 3 mere weeks to pack up a lot of stuff & clean the place would be overwhelming for me. Not of God.
Then the Lord reminded me of a time around 4 1/2 years ago,where I was saying the same thing to him then, as I was now, when we were buying a house of our own in the "middle of nowhere". It was a nice looking spacious home. I remember several times saying to the Lord, "Lord, this seems too good to be true! Would You really get us this home?" My flesh wanted it so badly! At the time, we were living in a small 2 bedroom, paying a lot for it, with landlords that had crossed some lines that shouldn't have been crossed. We wanted OUT. So we ended up getting the house & the next 2 1/2 years were like HELL. That was NOT God's best for us. But we got impatient, & we wanted out of the trial we were going through. So we just went ahead, convincing ourselves God was in it. I mean, why would He want us to live there, paying someone else's mortgage & having landlords who had done things they shouldn't have, right? Wrong.
God is not concerned about our comfort. Did you hear that? He's not!! He is more concerned about our growth, and growth doesn't occur without trials & tribulations. And if we go through those trials & tribulations & wait upon the Lord to deliver us, then it will be worth the wait. We are essentially holding out for God's biggest blessings. But in the meantime...
...In the meantime, He wants us---He wants me---to learn how to be content in any & every situation. To be grateful for what I have (nice yard, clothesline,big windows, etc.), rather than desiring what I don't have (cupboard space, closet space, wood heat, etc.).
My husband, about 10 minutes after we'd been laying there supposedly "sleeping", he spoke, & he was having the same thoughts as I was. So we prayed in agreement, that if this was of the Lord, it would come to pass, otherwise, let another take the place.
Now, we, not being able to move any sooner than December 1st, if the woman who is renting that beautiful home somehow agrees to hold it for us (which would be nothing short of a miracle), then we will know the Lord is in it! So we meet with her tomorrow afternoon, to find out what's going on.
So whether I move or whether I stay here another winter, I will accept it. Yet I know God wants me to do far more than merely accept it. He wants me to be joyful & grateful in the meantime. "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." That is God's will for me...and for you. He doesn't want us to jump out of the fire when it gets hot. He wants us to remain in it, so that we can be purged of all the impurities in our lives. And when we have persevered, there will be a greater blessing.
My husband & I have a habit of jumping out of the fire, & missing out on God's best. I pray this time that God will have HIS perfect will, & we won't just accept it, but rejoice in it.